Good news.. Bad news..

Good news: I got my mobile back! It's fine!!! YEHEY!!!

Bad news: I don't have a charger! No parts available! (The charger was the culprit!)

News from the other side of the fence:

Matt's applying for a job in Singapore. He still keeps saying that isasama nya ako sa Singapore.  .. OK ..

Karen still says I'm in love with Matt. I vehemently said NO to that. Karen says it's because I'm blooming.. (really?)

.. mobile under repair..

<sigh>

I'm in an internet cafe. Listening to sounds saved on my mini-SD card. I don't know how to live without my mobile!!!!

I took the phone to the Nokia Care center again in Ali Mall. It was still having the same problem. The tech guy reflashed the phone and advised me to reformat my mini-SD card. I said, NO!!!! No way!!! I have a LOT of stuff in there including 119 mp3s of my favorite songs!!

Finally isolated the problem to my friggin' charger! ACCCKKK! So I had to go back again and leave my phone AND charger to those people again. Here's the worst part: I might be getting the phone back tomorrow morning! The HELL?! I mean, how long does it take to check a freakin' charger?!!! WAAAAHHHH!!!

I am now contemplating of buying a back-up phone. Huhuhu.. Will decide in a while..

If only…

Karen says I'm in love.

In love with whom? Matt? I don't think so. Do you think so? Hmmm..

I am not expecting anything from Matt. He is a friend. Nothing more. It's awkward if you fell in love with your best friend, isn't it? I guess I'm dealing with this one day at a time. I pray and hope that I won't do something extremely stupid to lose him as a friend.

Matt had a problem kanina. Kawawa naman yung best friend ko. So I did what I can do at that time. I called him up. (Goodbye Php1800+!) I can only be there for him when he's pissed, when he's sad.. when he's feeling down. It's what I can only do. I wish I could do more though…

Honestly, I don't want Matt to be sad. I want him to be happy. I don't want to think about him dying even if he keeps talking about it. I made him promise never to mention DEATH again. (Reminds me too much of my ex.)

We talked about him going home with me to ILOILO. I want him to meet my mom and my dad. I want him to be a part of my family because I know at times, he lacks the caring and warmth of one when he needed it most. I want him to meet my crazy sisters. <smiles> I want him to meet my relatives including Tita Milag (ang pintasera) on my dad's side. Hahahah! Tita Milag, eto na katapat mo!!!

I want to fatten him up! He's too skinny by half. <sigh> I wish we could make it on September 8th.  

.. dazed and confused ..

I'm in the office. Had a very eventful weekend! Promise! <wink>

Met Matt yesterday evening for dinner. Finally met the guy who's the boon and bane of my existence. We were supposed to meet at around 8PM but unfortunately he got stuck in traffic. Muntik pa syang mawala. In any case, he got to our frontgate around 9PM. Finally. I get to meet my so-called best friend.

Matt is tall. Skinny tall. He's 6'1". He was wearing a striped polo tee, jeans and flipflops. He was driving an old Toyota Corolla. Yung box-type. But it was well-maintained. His car smelled nice.

We ate at Adobo Republic. Yung sa may Metrolane Complex sa 20th Avenue. Then we drove around and went to Riverbanks where we sat on the grass at nagpalamok! Hahahah.. it was nice spending the night with Matt. He was full of laughter contrary to the previous conversations that we've had over the phone wherein he was oftentimes morose and despondent even. It was a welcome change. <smiles> We didn't talk about his problems. We didn't talk about mine. We just talked and laughed. Yeah.. Laughed. <smiles>

We went home early. The car was acting up. So tumambay na lang kami sa bahay. Tito Vanni made this bamboo bench for us some time ago. He painted it white. We just sat there again and talked about a lot of things. Matt never failed to make me laugh that night. He wrapped his arms around me. Hugged me and kissed my forehead. Kissed my cheeks, the tip of my nose… Then he kissed me on the lips. Not the quick smack reserved for friends. But the seeking, coaxing kiss of lovers. <sigh>

And then he said, "Sama ka sa akin Best sa Singapore.. "  which he's been saying like forever. And then, "Best, pakasalan mo ako."

..OK..

I want to believe what he's saying. I really want to believe. But I know that he doesn't mean it. Any of it. <sigh>

What are words anyway?

I wanted to ask what was that kiss all about.. And all he could say was "Sorry." But I don't believe he is.

I wanted to ask him a lot of questions but Deedee says it's too soon for him to give me an explanation. I guess I need to give him more time to sort things out within himself before I do ask my questions. But then again, I NEED to know where I stand in his universe. Am I his sun or just another star in his orbit?

Truly, madly, deeply…

Finished uploading Tita Ana's photos. I'm turning to be a real photographer! Hahahaha!

Got home around 8am this morning. Spent the night with someone wonderful. I don't know but he gave me something to smile about.. He cheered me up. <smiles>

And that's all I'm gonna say in the matter. <wink> <wink>

And by the way, my lips are swollen. <wink> <wink>